How Virginia Custody Law Handles PCS Military Moves and Parenting Plan Changes
PCS orders can completely upend a custody schedule that had been working fine for years, especially for families in Virginia Beach, Norfolk, Chesapeake, and the rest of Hampton Roads. When the military tells you to move, you cannot simply say no. At the same time, Virginia courts focus on what is best for your child, not what is most convenient for the military or either parent.
In this post, we will walk through how PCS orders and parenting plans fit together under Virginia law, what a military parent must show to modify custody, and how judges handle relocation requests when a move is driven by military service.
Understanding PCS Orders and Virginia Parenting Plans
A Permanent Change of Station (PCS) order is the military directive that tells a service member to move to a new duty station. That move might be across the country or overseas. For military families here in Hampton Roads, PCS orders are a normal part of life, especially with nearby installations and commands throughout Virginia Beach, Norfolk, and Chesapeake.
A parenting plan (or custody and visitation order) is the court-approved schedule that controls where your child lives, how holidays are divided, and how you and your co-parent make major decisions. In Virginia, these orders are built around the child’s “best interests,” a legal standard listed in Virginia Code section 20 124.3. That statute tells judges to consider things like the child’s age and needs, each parent’s involvement, the existing relationship with each parent, any history of abuse, and each parent’s willingness to support the child’s relationship with the other parent.
PCS orders do not automatically rewrite your parenting plan. Until a judge signs a new order, everyone is expected to follow the existing one. That is why it is critical to understand how to raise relocation and modification issues the right way and as early as possible.
How Virginia Custody Orders Work When You Are Military
Under Virginia law, the court can award sole or joint legal custody (decision making), sole or joint physical custody (where the child lives), or a combination of the two. Virginia Law
For military families, that often looks like:
- One parent having primary physical custody in Hampton Roads while the other parent is stationed elsewhere, with extended summer and holiday time.
- True shared physical custody while both parents remain local, with alternating weeks or a 2 2 3 or 4 3 schedule.
- A long-distance plan that uses virtual visits, phone calls, and block visits when the service member returns from deployment or temporary duty.
When PCS orders arrive, they can disrupt any of these arrangements. Sometimes, both parents want to work together to update the plan. Other times, one parent strongly opposes the move. In either situation, Virginia courts are going to look at two big questions:
- Has there been a “material change in circumstances” since the last custody order
- If so, what new arrangement is in your child’s best interests now
PCS orders are usually a serious change in circumstances, but they are not enough by themselves to guarantee a change in custody.
When PCS Orders Count as a “Material Change in Circumstances”
To modify an existing custody or visitation order in Virginia, the moving party (the person asking for the change) must show that there has been a material change in circumstances since the last order was entered. Only after the court finds that a change will it reconsider custody under the best interests standard.
PCS orders often qualify as a material change because:
- The child’s primary residence may move a long distance
- The child’s school, community, and daily routine may change
- The distance may make the current schedule impossible (for example, alternating weeks when one parent will be in another state or overseas)
However, that is only step one. The court still has to decide whether changing custody or allowing relocation with the child is in the child’s best interests.
Examples of PCS-related “material changes” a judge may consider
- A parent who previously lived in Hampton Roads receives PCS orders to another state or country
- A service member returns from deployment and is now available to exercise more consistent parenting time
- A PCS move will dramatically increase or decrease travel time between households
- A new spouse’s military orders will require the child’s household to move
We work with our clients to frame these facts clearly for the judge, with documentation of PCS orders, deployment schedules, and realistic travel plans for the child.
Notice Requirements Before You Relocate With Your Child
Virginia has specific notice requirements for relocation. In many cases, if there is already a custody or visitation order in place and you wish to move your child to a new address, you must give written notice at least 30 days before the move to both the court and the other parent, unless the judge has excused that requirement for safety reasons.
Courts take this notice requirement seriously. PCS orders do not excuse a parent from following Virginia’s notice rules. If a parent moves a child without proper notice or without permission when a move violates the current order, that parent can face serious consequences, including:
- Contempt of court
- Loss of primary custody
- Make up visitation or changes in the schedule in favor of the non-moving parent
We encourage our military clients to contact us as soon as PCS orders are on the horizon, not after everything is already set. Early notice gives us more options to negotiate with the other parent, seek temporary orders, and protect both your rights and your child’s stability.
How Virginia Judges Evaluate Relocation in Military PCS Cases
Once the court finds a material change in circumstances, it revisits the best interests of the child factors. Virginia Code section 20 124.3 lists several things judges must consider, including the child’s relationships with each parent, the child’s needs, the role each parent plays in the child’s life, and each parent’s ability to cooperate and support the child’s relationship with the other parent.
When relocation is driven by PCS orders, judges often focus on:
- Impact on the child’s relationship with the non-moving parent: How much time will the child realistically spend with the other parent if the move happens, compared to now
- Quality of the relationships, not just the quantity of days: Which parent has been more involved in schoolwork, medical appointments, extracurricular activities, and daily routines
- Reasons for the move: PCS orders are not optional, which can weigh differently than a purely voluntary move, but judges still look at whether the move benefits the child or primarily benefits the parent
- Practical details of the proposed plan: Travel arrangements, costs, school options at the new duty station, access to extended family, childcare, and support networks
- Child’s preference, if old enough and mature: While there is no fixed age at which a child “chooses,” the statute allows judges to consider a child’s reasonable preference as one factor, especially with teens.
Relocation cases are rarely easy wins. Virginia appellate courts have repeatedly emphasized that the moving parent must show that the relocation will benefit the child, not just the parent, and that the court must give careful weight to the loss of regular contact with the other parent.
How PCS Orders Affect Different Types of Custody
PCS orders can affect families differently depending on their current custody structure.
Primary physical custody with visitation to the other parent
If one parent has primary physical custody and receives PCS orders, the court may be asked to decide whether:
- The child should relocate with that parent, with a new long-distance schedule for the other parent
- Primary custody should shift to the non-moving parent so the child can stay in Virginia
Judges will compare the stability and support available in each home, the child’s history in the current community, and the practical reality of keeping both parents meaningfully involved.
Shared physical custody
Shared physical custody cases often become more complicated when PCS orders require a long-distance move. Long drives or flights may make a 50 50 schedule impossible.
In some shared custody cases, a judge may:
- Convert to primary custody with one parent, with longer blocks of time given to the other parent during school breaks, or
- Keep joint legal custody but adjust physical custody and visitation to reflect the new realities of distance
Again, the question is how to preserve the child’s relationships and stability, not how to keep a perfectly even calendar.
Making Your Parenting Plan PCS Friendly
Even before PCS orders arrive, we can help build parenting plans that anticipate the possibility of military moves. Thoughtful planning can make future transitions smoother and reduce conflict.
A PCS-friendly parenting plan might include:
- Clear relocation and notice language: Spell out how and when notice must be given if a parent intends to move, including moves within Hampton Roads and moves out of the region
- Alternate long-distance schedules: Include a “local schedule” and a “long-distance schedule” that automatically applies if parents live a certain distance apart
- Virtual visitation provisions: Regular video calls, shared online activities, and communication guidelines so the child stays connected to the nonresidential parent
- Travel cost sharing: Clarify who pays for flights or long drives and how those costs are divided based on income or other factors
- Flexibility around deployment: Outline how time missed due to deployment or temporary duty can be made up later, while still putting the child’s routine first
A well-drafted plan helps set expectations for both parents, which can reduce last-minute crises when the military hands down new orders.
Practical Steps To Take As Soon As You Receive PCS Orders
If you are a military or former military parent in Virginia and you receive PCS orders that will affect your child’s schedule, there are several steps we recommend taking right away:
- Gather your documents: Keep copies of your PCS orders, current custody order, and any previous modifications in one place.
- Avoid making promises you cannot keep: It is natural to tell your command that you will move on a certain date, but if custody litigation is likely, we want to be realistic about timelines and options.
- Talk to us before you move your child: Moving a child before the court approves a relocation or schedule change can backfire. We can help you evaluate risks and plan the next steps under Virginia law.
- Consider mediation or negotiation: Judges appreciate parents who try to resolve disputes privately. As a firm with a strong family law and mediation focus, we often help clients negotiate new schedules that work for both parents and the child without a contested hearing.
- Think through logistics from your child’s perspective: What school will your child attend at the new duty station? How often will your child realistically see the other parent? How will you handle birthdays, holidays, and important events?
- Document your efforts to support the other parent’s relationship: Save texts and emails that show you are offering extra calls or extended visits. Judges look closely at which parent is more likely to encourage a healthy relationship with the other parent going forward.
How Our Virginia Beach Family Law Firm Helps Military Families
The Law Office of Laura L. McQuesten, PLLC is a Virginia Beach family law firm dedicated to guiding families through difficult transitions, including custody and relocation disputes involving military service members and their children.
We focus our practice on family law matters such as:
- Child custody and visitation
- Military and civilian divorce
- Child support and spousal support
- Adoption and guardianship
Our firm represents families throughout Virginia Beach, Norfolk, Chesapeake, Suffolk, Portsmouth, and surrounding communities in Southeastern Virginia.
Because we practice in local courts and also serve as Guardian ad litem in some matters, we understand how judges in this region tend to view relocation, PCS moves, and “best interests” in real, day-to-day cases.
When you work with us on a PCS-related custody issue, we will:
- Review your current orders and any prior agreements
- Explain how Virginia law applies to your specific situation
- Help you decide whether to seek modification, oppose relocation, or negotiate a new parenting plan
- Collect and organize the evidence that will matter most to the judge
- Represent you in mediation, settlement discussions, or court hearings as needed
Our goal is to protect your child’s stability and well-being while respecting the realities of military life.
Contact The Law Office of Laura L. McQuesten, PLLC, Today for a Consultation About Your Case
If PCS orders or a potential move are raising questions about your child custody arrangement, you do not have to navigate this alone. Relocation cases in Virginia are fact-intensive and can be difficult to win without a clear strategy that focuses on your child’s best interests and the specific standards our courts use.
We invite you to contact The Law Office of Laura L. McQuesten, PLLC, to schedule a confidential consultation about your situation. Whether you are the parent who received PCS orders or the parent who fears losing regular time with your child, we are here to answer your questions and help you plan the right next steps.
Our Virginia Beach office serves military and civilian families throughout Virginia Beach, Norfolk, Chesapeake, and the surrounding Hampton Roads area. You can reach us by phone at the number listed on our website or by using our online contact form to request a consultation.
We look forward to helping you protect what matters most.
Disclaimer: The articles on this blog are for informative purposes only and are no substitute for legal advice or an attorney-client relationship. If you are seeking legal advice, please contact our law firm directly.