Taking the first step toward divorce or a custody change can feel overwhelming. At The Law Office of Laura L. McQuesten, PLLC, we aim to make the process clearer by helping you prepare for a productive Virginia Beach family law consultation. When you walk into our office, you are not just meeting with a lawyer; you are beginning a partnership focused on helping you understand your options and prepare for the next steps.
The initial consultation is your opportunity to share your story and receive a strategic overview of your legal options. That said, because Virginia family law is highly fact-specific, the quality of the advice we provide depends largely on the information you bring to the table. By arriving organized and prepared, you allow us to spend less time on administrative data collection and more time on the high-level strategy that will move your case forward. To help you make the most of this meeting, we have compiled a comprehensive checklist based on current Virginia law and common documentation needs in divorce, custody, and support matters.
Establishing the Right Mindset for Your Meeting
Before you even gather your first document, it is important to center your focus. A legal consultation is a professional exchange, but it is also a safe space. We encourage you to bring an open mind and a commitment to total transparency. First, identify your primary goals. Are you most concerned about maintaining the family home, or is a specific custody arrangement your top priority? Knowing what a win looks like to you helps us tailor our advice from day one.
What you share in a consultation is generally treated as confidential, and we encourage you to be fully transparent so we can give you informed guidance. Whether the facts are favorable or difficult, we need the full picture to advise you effectively. If there are concerns regarding substance use, financial indiscretions, or a new partner, sharing these details now allows us to build a proactive defense rather than a reactive one later in the process.
We are here to guide you through the law, not to judge your life choices.
The Financial Paper Trail: Securing Your Assets
Virginia is an equitable distribution state, which means the court seeks a fair, but not necessarily equal, division of marital property and debts. To understand what is at stake, we need a clear window into your financial life. While you do not need every single receipt for the last decade, certain documents are non-negotiable for a productive first meeting.
You should aim to bring copies of your most recent tax returns, typically from the last two to three years. These documents provide a baseline for income and marital assets. Additionally, collect your most recent pay stubs for both yourself and your spouse. Virginia’s child support guidelines in § 20-108.2 use a schedule up to a combined gross monthly income of $42,500, with additional percentage calculations for income above that level.
Because the guidelines are presumptive and case-specific factors can justify deviations, bringing complete income and expense information helps us evaluate realistic outcomes. Knowing where you fall within this guideline framework is essential for calculating potential child support or spousal support obligations accurately.
For high-asset cases or business owners, the checklist becomes more nuanced. If you own a professional practice or a small business in the Hampton Roads area, try to bring any recent valuations or profit and loss statements. We also suggest gathering information on retirement accounts, including 401(k) statements, IRAs, and any deferred compensation plans. Even if these accounts are in only one spouse's name, they may still be considered marital property under Virginia law to the extent acquired or funded during the marriage.
The Military Component: Navigating the 10/10 Rule and Beyond
Given our firm’s proximity to NAS Oceana, Norfolk Naval Shipyard, and other major installations, military divorce is a cornerstone of our practice. If you or your spouse are a service member, your checklist must include military-specific records that a standard civilian firm might overlook. Please bring a recent Leave and Earnings Statement (LES). If either spouse is separated or retired, bring the DD214 as well.
The “10/10 rule” affects whether DFAS can pay a former spouse directly; it does not determine whether a court may award a share of military retired pay in the first place.
We also need to discuss the status of the Survivor Benefit Plan (SBP) and any existing military protective orders. Under federal law and the Uniformed Services Former Spouses’ Protection Act (USFSPA), military retirement is divisible, but the Frozen Benefit Rule remains a complex hurdle. This rule essentially freezes the value of the pension at the time of divorce for those still on active duty.
In many cases involving an active-duty or drilling member who is not yet receiving retired pay, federal law requires the retired-pay division to be calculated using pay grade/high-3 (as applicable) and years of service as of the date of divorce, then adjusted by COLAs.
If you are facing an upcoming PCS move or deployment, bring your orders or a projected timeline of your transition. These details are critical because they impact both the division of military retirement pay and the feasibility of various custody and visitation schedules.
Digital and Legislative Updates
Family law cases continue to evolve, and digital evidence is now just as important as physical paperwork. We recommend that you prepare a digital folder for your consultation. This folder should include any relevant text messages, emails, or social media posts that may be pertinent to your case. Only save information you can access lawfully. Do not guess passwords, bypass privacy settings, or access an account you are not authorized to use.
Furthermore, a significant update to Virginia Code § 20-124.6 enacted in 2025 has strengthened a parent’s right to access digital records. Even if you do not have primary physical custody, you are generally entitled to access school and health portals, such as PowerSchool or MyChart. The law now explicitly guarantees access to records stored on or accessible from a secure website. Virginia law also recognizes limited exceptions, including situations where a court orders otherwise for good cause or where certain health-record access restrictions apply.
If you have been denied this access, bring any correspondence from the school or healthcare provider stating as much. We can use this information to ensure your parental rights are being upheld under the latest state mandates.
Child-Centric Documentation and Custody Prep
If your case involves children, their best interests are our primary focus. To help us understand the current family dynamic, we suggest creating a basic calendar of the last six months. This calendar should reflect which parent handles the majority of the daily transitions, who attends doctor appointments, and how holidays have been shared. This documentation helps us argue for a schedule that maintains stability for your children.
You should also bring a list of child-related expenses. This includes the cost of health insurance premiums for the children, work-related childcare costs, and any extraordinary expenses for extracurricular activities or special educational needs. If there are existing custody orders from a previous relationship or a prior court in another state, these are mandatory for us to review. We cannot advise you on modifying an order until we have analyzed the specific language currently in place.
The Legal Paper Trail: Prior Orders and Agreements
If you have already been served with legal papers, such as a Complaint for Divorce or a Petition for Custody, please bring the entire packet, including any proof of service or certified-mail documentation. The date and method of service are legally significant and can dictate our filing deadlines.
Additionally, if you and your spouse signed a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement, that document will serve as the roadmap for your case. We will need to review it to determine its enforceability and how it alters the standard rules of equitable distribution or support. Likewise, if you have already signed a temporary separation agreement, we must see it to ensure it does not inadvertently waive any of your long-term rights.
Questions to Ask Us During Your Consultation
A consultation is a two-way street. While we are learning about you, you should also be evaluating whether our firm is the right fit for your needs. We encourage you to bring a written list of questions so that you do not forget anything in the heat of the moment.
Common questions we suggest include:
- How does my military status or my spouse’s military status affect the timeline of this case?
- Based on the documents I brought, what are the biggest challenges you foresee?
- What is the typical communication style of your firm, and how often will I receive updates?
- What are the next immediate steps I should take to protect my finances before filing?
- How do recent changes in Virginia child support guidelines apply to my specific income level?
What to Bring That People Forget
- Photo ID
- Any upcoming court dates/notices
- A list of 3–5 priority questions
- A one-page timeline of major events (separation date, filings, PCS/deployment dates, major financial changes)
Moving Forward with Confidence
Preparation is the antidote to the fear of the unknown. By following this checklist, you are taking an active role in your own legal defense. You are providing the tools we need to build a strong, evidence-based strategy that protects your assets, your children, and your peace of mind.
At The Law Office of Laura L. McQuesten, PLLC, we focus on clear guidance, thorough preparation, and practical strategy. We are your advocates and your partners. When you come to us prepared, we can hit the ground running, working toward a resolution that allows you to close this chapter and begin the next one with financial and emotional stability.
Contact The Law Office of Laura L. McQuesten, PLLC Today for a Consultation About Your Case
If you’re ready to schedule a Virginia Beach family law consultation, we are here to listen and lead the way. Navigating a divorce or custody dispute in Virginia Beach, Norfolk, Chesapeake, Suffolk, or Portsmouth, and throughout Southeastern Virginia, requires an attorney who understands the local courts and the unique needs of our community. We invite you to contact us to schedule your initial consultation. Together, we can review your documents, address your concerns, and develop a clear plan of action tailored to your specific goals.
Call our office today at 757-720-7516 or reach out through our online contact form to take the first step toward your new future.
Disclaimer: The articles on this blog are for informative purposes only and are no substitute for legal advice or an attorney-client relationship. If you are seeking legal advice, please contact our law firm directly.